Light and dark
I struggled to know how to write this blog post. Should I keep it light and just focus on the positives; find a funny story or two? Or should I be open and honest about the less pretty aspects of life here? I've decided on the latter, because I want you to know what it’s really like here…it’s not all happy and successful serving on the mission field. And I want you to know what has been happening so that you can pray more specifically. October was a really difficult month, but God has really been speaking to me through 2 Corinthians 12:9, “My grace is all you need. My power works best in weakness. So now I am glad to boast about my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ can work through me.” (NLT)
Light and Dark Kabwe is a mining town. At 6am every morning I can hear the ‘call-to-work’ siren from the nearby mine going off. And at 6:01 my house is plunged into darkness. The power has been cut. Every morning at 6:01 (ish) we have what’s called load shedding. An attempt to minimize power usage, the power gets turned off for about 8 hrs at a time in different districts. Our power goes from 6am – 1pm (ish) every day. It’s amazing in that moment how dark it gets. One moment I’m sitting eating my breakfast, and without warning, without a sound, darkness. Light then dark. This is a pretty good illustration of my last month. Light, then without warning, dark. Then light again.
My month started with one of the teachers here suddenly needing to travel to the UK. Her sister was on her deathbed and she hoped to see her one last time before she died. Although I’ve only been here a short time, the teachers and students here have really become like a family to me, and it was hard to see her grieving. She left and we had to take over her classes. Things got a bit busier. The next week one of my friends who did initial training with me suddenly burst into tears and said one of her family members had died (uncle) and she was having a tough time being so far away from her family at that moment. I just held her and let her cry. I didn’t know what else to do. Dark.
The next two weeks saw me in and out of hospital, visiting one of my mentees who was ill. More sickness and pain. Dark. One of my student’s uncle unexpectedly died. Another of my students had some money stolen from her (significant amount that was going towards buying a plot of land) and I felt so helpless as I saw both of their sadness. I just gave them hugs and prayed for them. Two of our teachers in Malawi were robbed at knife point in the middle of the night and are still struggling from fear at night time. It's hard to help someone from a distance. More darkness.
The student I wrote about in my last blog post's health started getting worse the week after the above incidences, and I made three trips to the clinic with her (no results) and she finally ended up in hospital in pain and struggling to breathe. With my colleagues away at last-minute mandatory government training, I was the only teacher around and so ended up at the hospital with her. That in itself was an experience! It’s nothing like an Australian hospital. It’s a depressing place. Someone (friend / family member) has to stay with the patient the whole time to feed, nurse and care for them. I sat with her all afternoon, watching her struggle to breathe, obviously in pain. No information from the doctors. I had no idea how to help, so I just held her and helped her stay calm, and prayed. Lots of praying. One of our students volunteered to stay overnight with her. The following day I was teaching, and this student was back in my class (a second student having gone to stay with the sick student). She was obviously tired from not having slept too well at the hospital but was still trying to participate in my lessons. Break time came and she was just going to get 30 min of rest when her phone rang. Her younger brother had just died. Darkness. More tears, more grief and not much I felt I could do.
An hour later one of the other teachers returned from the training and ask, “How are you doing?” I just burst into tears.
Lots of darkness…pain...grief…sorrow. At times it's been overwhelming. But in the midst of it, light. Beautiful moments of grace and beauty.
Some of the ‘light’ moments. I thank God for the amazing response from family and friends when I talked about this student's needs. You responded in generosity and her school fees were covered…with a bit left over for her to pay to rewrite her year 12 exams! Ah, I can’t describe the joy in her face when she realised her prayers had been answered for the school fees. There was laughter and tears of joy and I got a lot of hugs. Thank-you! She ended up in hospital this month but the doctors eventually found she had pneumonia. Once she had the right treatment, it cleared up within a week and she is now bouncing around again, full of joy. Thank-you to everyone who has been praying for her!
The flowers came out on the trees. Such beautiful colours and reminder of God’s beautiful creation. Purple jacarandas, white frangipanis, yellow and red flowers, pink and orange…and mangoes. So many mangoes! Light.
I have also received many generous gifts from supporters in the past few weeks. Thank-you! I was able to make a trip to Lusaka and buy my own water filter. It has improved the water heaps and because it is bigger than the one I was borrowing, I’ve been able to filter enough water in this hot weather.
We had the first rains of the season. A huge thunder and lightning storm and then the skies opened up and it poured! Amazing to see all that rain! It’s rained once more since, but we continue to pray for more rain for this dry land.
More moments of light as I randomly receive hugs from my students, and I've had some really meaningful conversations with them in the midst of the pain. I saw them embrace the role of a family as they all insisted on coming to the hospital in their short lunch break to visit the sick student. They are loving, encouraging and supporting one another which is beautiful. Light and dark. Part of life. As the people here become more like a family to me, we share both moments together…the joyous and the sad. And although it’s tough at the time, it’s good too. I’ve learnt a lot about myself and about the love of God during this month. I’ve learned that God is in both the dark and the light. In fact Psalm 139:12 says that darkness is as light to Him. There is no darkness too great for him. And in it all, I can say that I am weak, but He is strong. So I will boast about His strength!
Praise God that I was able to get my Zambian driver’s license! It took a medical test, a theory test, two driving tests and hours in the licensing office but I got there in the end. I can now legally drive in Zambia!
